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Sports Jokes

'This is the worst golf course I've ever played on!' complained the golfer.
'This isn't the golf course. We left that an hour ago,' commented the caddie.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Our basketball team is so bad that our guard tried to kill himself yesterday by jumping in front of a bus. Luckily it went right through his legs like everything else.
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(So far it's 3 point, based on 2 ratings)

Q: If you have a UVA football player and a Virginia Tech football player in the same car at the same time, who drives?
A: The state trooper.
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(So far it's 3.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

There were two fishing-enthusiasts in a boat under a bridge. They were fishing together on a Saturday morning, as always.
When a funeral procession went through the bridge, one of them looked up, stood up, took off his cap and bowed his head. After the procession crossed the bridge, the man put on his cap, picked up his rod and continued fishing.
'That was touching. I didn't know you had it in you,' said the other fishing-enthusiast.
The first replied, 'I guess it was the right thing to do. I was married to her for 44 years, after all.'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Papa Bear and Mama Bear had serious marital problems. They decided to divorce, and Baby Bear had to choose between them.
The judge asked him, 'Would you like to live with your father?'
Baby Bear replied, 'No, because Papa Bear beats me every day.'
'Okay, then do you want to live with your mother?'
'No, she beats me even more times.'
The judge was a bit confused and saddened hearing this. 'Well, you have to live with someone, and since your parents have marital problems they will divorce soon. Is there any relatives you would like to stay with?' he asked.
'Yes,' answered Baby Bear, 'with Bonnie Bear and Bobby Bear who live in Chicago.'
'Are you sure they will treat you well?' asked the judge.
'Oh, indeed,' replied Baby Bear, 'the Chicago Bears don't beat anybody.'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 2 ratings)

Q: Why do women like making love to the Australian golfer, Greg Norman?
A: He always finishes second.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Once there was a guy that went skydiving. He jumped out of the plane, but soon discovered his parachute is torn.
His companion asked, 'Wanna race, buddy, eh?'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Deciding to take up jogging, the middle-aged man went to buy jogging shoes. To his surprise, there was a huge variety of them. While trying on a basic pair, he noticed a small but confusing feature, a pocket on the shoe. He and asked the clerk about it.
'Why is there a little pocket on the shoe, here on the side?'
'Oh, that's for spare change. When you jogged too far, you can call your wife to pick you up.'
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(So far it's 4.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

The football team was about to finish their daily practice session when a large, feathered creature, a big turkey walked onto the field.
The players were more puzzled, when the turkey walked up to the head coach and demanded a tryout. Everyone stared in silence as the turkey caught pass after pass and then ran right through the defensive line.
When the turkey returned to the sidelines, the coach shouted, 'You are awesome! Sign up for the season, please, and I will see to it that you get a huge bonus.'
The turkey replied, 'Forget the bonus. Does the season go past Thanksgiving Day?'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Josh came to work on Monday and his colleagues asked him how his weekend was.
'I was playing golf on the weekend,' he answered.
'How was it? Did it go well?' they asked.
'I hit two of my best balls,' he replied.
'Tell us about it!'
'I stepped on a rake.'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

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