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'Billy, I thought I told you to keep an eye on your little brother, where is he?' asked the father his son.
His son replied thoughtfully, 'Daddy, if he knows as much about canoeing as he thinks he does, he is out canoeing then. Well, if he knows as much about canoeing as I think he does, he is out swimming.'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Q: If you have a UVA football player and a Virginia Tech football player in the same car at the same time, who drives?
A: The state trooper.
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(So far it's 3.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

Frederick had been playing golf for five years, and he had the finest equipment. However, his technique never improved a bit.
As his friend, Rick, watched him playing, he promptly drove a brand new golf ball into the lake at the first hole.
He drove another new golf ball into the woods at the second hole.
He lost a new golf ball in another part of the woods at the third hole.
'Why don't you use an old ball?' Rick asked.
'I have never had an old ball,' replied Frederick.
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(So far it's 4.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

A doctor, a priest and an engineer were waiting for a particularly slow group on the golf course.
'What's with these guys? We must have been waiting for 20 minutes! This slow play on the golf course is unacceptable.' said the engineer.
'I don't know, but I've never seen such a slow play!' said the doctor.
'I'm gonna ask Hector, the caddie,' said the priest. So they went to him.
'Hey, Hector, what's with that slow group ahead of us? They're rather slow, aren't they?'
'Oh, yes, that's a group of blind fire fighters. They lost their sight saving our golf course and clubhouse from a fire last year, so they can play here for free anytime,' replied Hector.
The group was silent for a moment.
'That is so sad, I will say a special prayer for them tonight,' said the priest.
'I'm going to contact my friend, who is an ophthalmologist and see if there's anything he can do for them,' said the doctor.
'Why cannot they play at night?' asked the engineer.
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Q: Why did they stop the leper hockey game?
A: Because there was a face-off in the corner.
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Ole went to the Olympic Games.
'Are you a pole vaulter?' turned a lady to him while sitting on a bench.
Ole replied, 'No, I am Norwegian and my name is not Valter.'
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Q: Why are penguins the best race drivers?
A: Because they are always in the pole position.
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Jack decided to take his boss, Frank to play 9 holes in their lunch break. While both men were playing excellent they were quite often held up by slow golfers, two women.
Jack offered to talk to the women and see if they can speed it up. He got about half of the way, but there stopped and jogged back. His boss asked what the problem was.
'So, turns out that I know the slow golfers. One of those women is my wife and the other my mistress,' admitted Jack.
Frank just shook his head at Jack and started toward the women determined to finish his round of golf. Soon he stopped, too, and turned around.
'What's wrong?' asked Jack.
Frank replied, 'It is a small world Jack, and you are fired!'
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Q: Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
A: So you can tell them apart from feminists.
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Q: What do fishermen and hypochondriacs have in common?
A: None of them has to catch anything to be happy.
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