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Rules of Military Work

Here are the main rules of military works:

1. Quantity of work: No matter how much you do, you will never ever do enough.

2. Quality of work: The minimum acceptable level is perfection.

3. Advice from the commanding officer: Eat a live long worm first thing in the morning, so nothing worse will happen to you during the day

4. The senior officer is always right.

5. When the senior officer is wrong, refer to rule 4.

6. Leave of absence for an operation: We are no longer allowing this. We hired you as you are, the full package. To have anything removed certainly makes you less than we bargained for.

7. Sickness: We will no longer accept the medical statement as proof of illness. No excuses will be acceptable. We believe that if you are able to go to see the doctor, you are able to come to work.

8. Death, other than your own: This is not an excuse anymore. Arrange the funeral services to be held late in the afternoon. We can let you off an hour early, provided all your work is up to date.

9. Death, your own: This can be accepted as an excuse, if you notice us two weeks before. We feel it is your duty to train someone else for your job.
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