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Puns Jokes

Q: What do you call a pig thief?
A: Hamburglar.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

I just leave my friend's answering machine message here:
"I am only here in spirit at the moment, but if you leave your number and name, I will get back to you as soon as I am here in person."
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(So far it's 3.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

Q: What is the season to be on a trampoline?
A: Spring-time.
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(So far it's 4.67 point, based on 3 ratings)

Q: How did the Vikings send secret messages long ago?
A: By norse code.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Q: How Angels greet each other?
A: Halo there!
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Q: Have you heard about the corduroy pillow?
A: Yes, it's making headlines.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Q: On what should you put the statue of your cat?
A: On a caterpillar.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Two atoms are running down the road and they run into each other. One asks the other, 'Are you all right?'
'No, I've lost an electron!'
'Are you sure?'
'Yes, I am positive!'
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(So far it's 4.67 point, based on 3 ratings)

A director is screen testing Jean-Claude Van Damme and Arnold Schwarzenegger for his new film about classic composers. Not having figured out, firstly he asks Jean-Claude who he would like to be.
'I like classic composers and my favorite is Mozart. I want to be Mozart!' he replies.
So the director says, 'Well, you can be Mozart.'
Then he turns to Arnold and asks, 'Arnie, which classic composer would you like to be?'
And Arnold says, 'Ah'll be Bach!'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

A man walks into an elegant restaurant and sits down. As he bends down to get his wallet he farts loudly with the waitress right behind her. He sits up shamefully and looks for a way to escape the total embarrassment. So he looks at the waitress and shouts, 'Stop that!'
The waitress calmly replies, 'Sure Mister, which way did it go?'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

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