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Q: What is a polygon?
A: Dead parrot.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A kind but a bit retarded soccer player died and went to heaven.
'There are too many people in heaven so you have to answer three questions to enter,' said St. Peter.
'Okay, no problem,' replied the soccer player.
'What two days of the week begin with the letter "T"?
'Today and tomorrow, it was easy.'
'Hmmm, I didn't think of that, this is not entirely correct, but I'll give it to you,' said St. Peter and continued, 'How many seconds are in a year?'
The soccer player replied, 'Twelve. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, etc.'
'That wasn't what I was thinking, but I'll give it to you, however I feel again, that this is not entirely correct answer. But go for the last question, what is God's first name?'
'Howard,' came the reply.
'How on earth did you get Howard?' asked St. Peter in his surprise.
'Well, it's easy. Our father, who art in heaven, Howard be thy name.'
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Q: Why should all men beware of beautiful witches?
A: Because they will sweep them off their feet.
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Work - It isn't just for sleeping anymore.
Succeed in spite of management.
If you can read this, you are not working.
If you do a good job and work hard, you might get a new job at a better company someday.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid now.
Rome did not create a great empire by having meetings. They did it by killing all those who opposed them.
Well, you may not like working here, but we pay your rent.
Hang in there, retirement is only twenty years away!
If you think we are a bad company, you should see our rivals.
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
Three days without human rights violation!
The person who smiles in the face of adversity probably has a scapegoat.
Pride, commitment, teamwork - words we use to get you to work for free.
Never quit until you have another job.
Go the extra mile. It makes your boss look like an incompetent slacker.
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(So far it's 3.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

The U. S. Government decided to collect data on what people say right before they get into a car accident.
89% of the people in 49 states said: "Oh, shit!"
In Texas 94% said: "Hold my beer. Watch this."
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 3 ratings)

Q: What is the difference between a fly and a bird?
A: A bird can fly but a fly cannot bird.
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Q: How can you tell an extroverted programmer?
A: When he talks to you, instead of his own shoes he looks at yours.
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(So far it's 4.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

An elderly couple went on a car trip in the US. They stopped at a restaurant for a nice breakfast. When they were back on the highway, the elderly lady told that she left her glasses in the restaurant. They had to turn around, but only could do that after driving quite a distance. The old man grumbled and complained all way long, telling his wife she really needs to be more responsible about her belongings. As the elderly lady got out of the car when they finally arrived, the old man said, 'While you are in there, you may as well get my sunglasses, too.'
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Q: What does TGIF mean on a blonde's T-shirt?
A: Tits Go In Front.
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

I accidentally opened my parachute in the rear of the plane during my first training session. I felt intimidated as I opened the cockpit door to confess to my superiors what I had done.
I expected a serious penalty for my dumbness on my first training session, but the captain calmly said, 'Well, son, if this plane goes down, that parachute will be yours.'
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