Children Jokes, Children Joke
⭐ Add JokestJokes.com to your Favorites! (Press CTRL+D)
📧 Get the best jokes every week by e-mail! It's free! (Click!)
🎁Are you a webmaster? Make your visitors happy with a free
Joke of the Day Box! (Click!)
Joke, Jokes, Fun
Joke Newsletter
You will get the best jokes of every week by e-mail!
It will be great, you need this!
E-mail:
  I have read and accept the Privacy Policy.
Joke Categories
ALL JokesAnimalBarBlondeBusinessCarChildrenComputerCriminalDoctorFarmerFoodKnock KnockLawyerMarriageMilitaryMother in LawOfficePolicePoliticalPunsSchoolSportsTravelWorkplaceYo MamaOther
You are here: HomeJokesChildren Jokes

Children Jokes

If it looks just like mine, it's mine.
If I think it's mine, it's mine.
If I like it, it's mine.
If I am doing or building something, all the pieces are mine.
If it is in my hand, it's mine.
If it it's near me, it's mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine.
If I had it a week ago, it's mine.
If it is broccoli, it's yours.
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A mother was reading Bible stories to her young daughter.
She read, 'The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city. However, his wife looked back and was turned into salt.'
Her daughter asked curiously, 'What happened to the flea?'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

On a flight to Miami, I was preparing my notes for one of the parent-education seminars I conduct as an educational psychologist.
The elderly lady sitting next to me told me that she was returning to Florida after having spent three weeks visiting her five children, ten grandchildren and five great-grandchildren in Phoenix. Then she asked about me, what I did for a living.
I told her that I am an educational psychologist, in spite of the fact that I expected her to ask me for free professional advice.
Instead she picked up the newspaper, sat back, and said, 'If there's anything you want to know, just ask.'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

The lifeguard ordered the mother to make her young son stop urinating in the pool.
'From time to time young children will urinate in a pool, everyone knows this,' answered the mother, giving him a lecture.
'Oh, you say so?' asked the lifeguard, 'From the diving board???'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Q: Why did the little boy throw the clock out the window?
A: He wanted to see time fly.
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A man was waiting at the hospital. His wife was inside the medical room, having their first child. After a while the obstetrician came out to talk to the nervous father.
'Hey, your baby is here. It's a girl. And guess what? She can fly!'
The obstetrician lifted up and then let go of the baby and it hit the floor. The father was out of his mind.
'Hey, do not worry, I am an experienced obstetrician. I know what I am doing. Listen, your baby really can fly. Watch it!'
Again, the doctor lifted up the baby, and this time threw it across the room. The baby hit the wall. The father was just about ready to kill the so called experienced obstetrician.
'Hey, hey, don't worry! Your baby was stillborn, I'm just joking with you.'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

The five year old son came home from Sunday School.
'What have you learnt today?' asked his father.
The son was quiet for a minute and then asked, 'Daddy, have any of the men in our family had their penises criticized?'
The wife rushed is the room and told him the correct word was "circumcised", but the answer was still yes.
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A little boy was attending his first wedding, his sister asked him, 'Do you know how many women a man can marry?'
'Yes, I know, sixteen,' the boy replied.
His sister was amazed that he had the answer right at the first weeding service.
'How do you know that?' she asked.
'It's easy, all you have to do is add up what the bishop said. 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer.'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

In a small town of Florida lived two boys, Trouble and Shut-up. They were friends, but every once in a while they got into a fight. Once, after they had both just gotten they favorite vanilla-strawberry ice cream, Trouble's ice cream fell. So he stole Shut-up's vanilla-strawberry ice cream and ran away. Shut-up ran after Trouble but finally lost him. He sat on a bench and started to cry. A police officer asked, 'What's your name?'
'Shut-up.'
The officer got angry. Asked again and got the same answer. 'Son, are you looking for trouble?'
And Shut-up said, 'Yeah, that jerk stole my ice cream!'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Once there was a little boy in church with his mother. He had to go to the toilet so he told, 'Mum, I have to piss.'
The mother replied, 'Willy, do not say "piss" in church. Next time you have to piss, use the word "whisper" instead because it's more polite.'
The next Sunday the little boy was in church with his father. This time, once again, he had to go to the toilet.
'Dad, I have to whisper,' he told his father.
The father said, 'Okay, here whisper in my ear.'
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
Worst :  
  : Best
(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Next 10 Children Jokes   >

Joke of the Day
You can have a Joke of the Day box on your website, too!
(This one right above!)
It's free and good for you! You only need to insert a short HTML code into your website and the Joke of the Day will appear there right away! (Every day a new joke totally automatically, maintenance free.) (Details...)
TOP 10 Jokes
1)Personal Insults
2)One Line at a Time
3)Little White Goat
4)Honest Cover Letter
5)Super Rich Investor
6)Dogs and Their Owners
7)Don't Drive in Texas
8)Sculptures on Display
9)Enthusiastic, Young Preacher
10)Survey on Sex
Best Jokes
(Joke Toplist)
Send Us a Joke!
Do you know a good joke?
Send it to us so we can put it on the website for everybody to read and laugh! It will be great!