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Blonde Jokes

Q: Why does the blonde hate making Kool-Aid?
A: Because she can't pour eight glass of water in that little packet.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

The helicopter came to save the lives of the ten women who were found on a deserted island. There were nine blondes and one redhead.
They caught the long rope, which was hanging from the helicopter, and the incredible flight began.
But one had to go to save the other's lives. During the incredible flight they proved to be too heavy.
No one could decide who should go, so finally the redhead said, 'I will get off.'
After a really touching speech from the redhead all of the blondes started clapping.
What is your opinion of this joke? Rate it!
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Q: Why did the police pulled over the blonde driver?
A: She was flashing people as her headlights weren't working.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A redhead, a brunette and a blonde went to a new confectionery shop together.
The redhead went to the counter and asked for a banana float without banana. The waitress was confused, but gave her the order.
The brunette went next, and asked for a coconut ice cream tower, without coconut. The waitress was really confused now, but she prepared that.
The blonde was listening to the other two orders, and she also wanted to order something special. So she went to the waitress and asked for an extra-large ginger ale without ginger.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A blonde is visiting the Paris Zoological Park. As she goes to the see the gorilla baby she comes across a vending machine. She has never seen this before. She stares the slot for the coins. After a few seconds she gets money out of her purse, puts 70 cents into the machine, and pushes a number and a letter. She is mesmerized by the precise machine, exactly letting out one chocolate bar. She repeats this again and again.
'Miss, can you please move? I would like to get some chocolate for my children.' says a woman after a few minutes.
The blonde replies, 'Excuse me, are you blind? I have a winning streak!'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 2 ratings)

Q: What does TGIF mean on a blonde's T-shirt?
A: Tits Go In Front.
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

Do not do today that which can be put off till tomorrow.
Do not get lost in the shuffle, shuffle along with the lost.
Do not bite the hand that has your paycheck in it.
Do not blame me, I tell you, nobody asked my opinion.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A blonde walks into a gas station. Her keys are left in the car, so she tells the cashier, 'I locked my keys in my car, unfortunately. I was wondering if you had a coat hanger maybe I could stick through the window and unlock the door.'
'Sure,' replies the cashier, 'I have better equipment to use, I will bring it.'
Some minutes later, the cashier walks to the car to see how the blonde is doing. He hears another voice.
'No, a little to the right,' says the other blonde inside the car.
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(So far it's 4.5 point, based on 2 ratings)

A blonde was visiting Paris for the first time. She wanted to see the city from the Eiffel Tower, but she couldn't find it. She asked a police officer for directions, 'Good morning officer, could you tell me how to get to the Eiffel Tower?'
The police officer replied, 'Oui Madame, wait there at the bus stop for the number 52 bus. It takes you right there.'
She thanked the officer and went to the bus stop. One and a half hour later the police officer returned to the same street and saw the blonde still waiting.
'Excuse me, but to get to the Eiffel Tower, I said to wait here for the number 52 bus. That was more than an hour ago. Why are you still here, waiting?'
The blonde answered, 'Do not worry, it won't be long now. The 49th bus just went by!'
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

A philosopher, a scientist and a blonde go to Hell. At the gate they receive a challenge from the Devil. If they can scam him, they can go to Heaven. The scientist goes first. He has a very hard biological question, he hopes he can scam the Devil with that. But the Devil gets a book and answers it. The philosopher tries next, with a complicated question to scam the Devil, but question is instantly replied. The blonde is the next one. She gets a chair and drills four holes in it. Then sits down and farts.
'So,' she starts, 'which hole did the fart come out of?'
'That is easy,' replies the Devil. 'All of them.'
'No, you are wrong. It came out of my anus!'
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(So far it's 3.75 point, based on 4 ratings)

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