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Our editors who have great sense of humor are collecting the best jokes since August of 1862, so for now we have more than 1458343 jokes on our webpage! (Yes, onemillion-fourhundred-fifty-eight-thousand-three hundred-forty-three!)
The jokes are here right now. Have a great laugh!
(Last joke update: 2022. May 28.)
A farmer told his neighbor that he had to shoot the cow. The neighbor asked, 'Was it mad?'
The farmer answered, 'Well it wasn't very happy about it.'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Oslo!
Oslo who?
Oslo down, what's the hurry?
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 2 ratings)

Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
July!
July who?
July to me about stealing my pencil?
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head?
A: DUG
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

A blonde was visiting Paris for the first time. She wanted to see the city from the Eiffel Tower, but she couldn't find it. She asked a police officer for directions, 'Good morning officer, could you tell me how to get to the Eiffel Tower?'
The police officer replied, 'Oui Madame, wait there at the bus stop for the number 52 bus. It takes you right there.'
She thanked the officer and went to the bus stop. One and a half hour later the police officer returned to the same street and saw the blonde still waiting.
'Excuse me, but to get to the Eiffel Tower, I said to wait here for the number 52 bus. That was more than an hour ago. Why are you still here, waiting?'
The blonde answered, 'Do not worry, it won't be long now. The 49th bus just went by!'
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

Q: What gets wetter as it dries?
A: The towel.
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

At a fancy restaurant a guest noticed that all of the waiters had two silver spoons in their pockets.
He asked one waiter about them, who replied, 'The most frequently dropped silverware are spoons. We keep them for quick replacement.'
A few minutes later the guest noticed that a string was hanging out of all the waiters' flies.
He asked another waiter about it, who replied, 'The string is for us to go to the bathroom. You know, when we pull it, it shoots and aims right away. Then we do not have to stop to wash our hands.'
The guest was impressed and asked, 'Well, I see, that's how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?'
The waiter whispered confidentially, 'Well, I don't know about the others, but I use the two silver spoons.'
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(So far it's 5 point, based on 1 ratings)

A judge awarded a divorce to the wife. He told the husband, 'I have decided to provide your wife with $650 a month for support.'
The husband replied, 'You are a very generous judge! Once in a while I will try to scatter a few dollars myself.'
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An anxious wife went to the police station, escorted by her neighbor. They reported that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description of the man who disappeared.
The wife started, 'He is 37 years old, 7-foot 2-inches, has blue eyes, blond wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs 190 pounds, is sophisticated, likes water sports, and is a good father.'
The neighbor objected, 'Marie, your husband is 4-foot 9-inches, bald and plump, he dropped from university and barely plays with children.'
The wife said, 'Yes, yes, but who wants to get HIM back?'
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(So far it's 4 point, based on 2 ratings)

Adam asked God, 'Why did you make Eve so beautiful?'
God replied, 'So you would love her.'
Adam kept asking, 'But God, once Eve is so beautiful, why did you make her so dumb?'
God replied, 'So she would love you, Adam.'
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